Tuesday, March 13, 2018

Experiencing the Joy of Transitioning Feels Really Powerful

The last time I saw Mallory Ortberg, author of the New York Times-bestselling Texts from Jane Eyre, co-founder of The Toast, and Slate’s Dear Prudence columnist, we spent a glorious afternoon coasting via aerial tramway to the top of a serious mountain, then rode something called a “mountain coaster” back down—which did not surprise me, because Mallory is the kind of friend and the kind of person who makes me feel like I can do new and brave things. With The Merry Spinster: Tales of Everyday Horror, Mallory has created something new and brave; it’s a gorgeously witty, frequently dark, consistently satisfying collection of tales that could only have come from this author. Like all the best fairy and folk tales, the stories offer surprises and sly winks to keep you in thrall, while illuminating all the vulnerability and deep complexity of relationships between family, friends, lovers, and enemies. It was a joy to chat with Mallory last month about the work of imposing shrewd new twists on beloved stories and characters, the unique challenges and pleasures of the short story form, and what it was like to write this new anthology while transitioning.

Nicole Chung: I’m always happy when we talk, and today I’m glad to have such a thrilling excuse to talk to you. Congratulations on your book! How are you? What’s been going on?

Mallory Ortberg: Well, today has been a very big day. When you called, I was finishing up at the gender clinic, where I got my very first injection of testosterone!

NC: Oh, congratulations, I am so excited for and proud of you!

MO: Thank you! As you know, I was on patches at a low dose for 90 days, in part because I was operating on a theory (that theory being: maybe I am trans; I don’t know really know what sort of trans experience this is; I don’t know how much of this I want), and that experiment went so very, very well. When I took a pause, it was very clear to me that I wanted to continue. So I decided to switch to injections. I just got my first shot at the clinic, and it felt fantastic.

NC: As your friend, I’ve felt really glad that there has been joy in each new step for you, which is not to minimize the challenges at all.

MO: It was a little over a year ago that I first started asking myself, consciously, “Am I trans?” I was finishing the book at that point. So much of the last year has been painful, isolating, frightening—but the moments of clarity, joy, and excitement that have come from being around other trans people and accessing medical transition have helped me realize this is not just about what I’m afraid of; this is also about wanting something, desiring something, excitedly looking toward the future and visualizing real possibility. Letting myself experience the joy of transitioning, and not just the fear, feels really powerful.

I’ve been so anxious with the idea of going on book tour. I know I’m going to look different than the last time I had a lot of public appearances. But as much as one can be certain of anything, I know that I want to go do this book tour as an out trans person.

by Nicole Chung, LitHub |  Read more:
Image: uncredited
[ed. Nobody on the web writes like Mallory (Danny). Here's another interview (Mallory is not gone). See also: So You've Decided to Drink More Water and Everything That’s Wrong About Raccoons]